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Confessions of an Afro Diva

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November 3rd, 2012

03:46 am - Hello again
I realised, that I actually left livejournal because the website layout was pretty awful, also blogger is just so much more popular. I'm 23 today, will soon be turning 24, my sis actually reminded me of my blog. For the first time ever she let me read her blog, and I have insight into her thoughts. It made me sad to read that she cried alone, when she was in her first year at university. Apart from my breakup with my ex boyfriend I don't think I shed a tear in my first year. With that being said, I pretty much cried every month in my postgrad - the same one I'm still on now.

I chose to study the longest course known to man; ARCHITORTURE!

I am still hanging in there, will have to face the music soon though and start planning a strategy so I can be employed by the time I graduate, but so far so good (despite the tears). It's just that I'm such an emotional person and this course is really trying me. I have literally gone from an A student to a struggling academic - scratch that I don't deserve the title of an academic, I simply attend an academic institution is all.

Anyways, enough waffle. I like abrupt finishes, chat later, maybe in another couple of years or so - God willing.

Bless you xx
Current Location: United Kingdom, Birmingham
Current Mood: awakeawake
Current Music: Keyshia cole - Enough of No Love

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April 29th, 2011

05:56 pm - Flying time
Wow, how time flies, I'm 22 now, and with a new blog at: http://askmeagaintomorrow.blogspot.com, reflecting at the 18 year old me, looking for a much simplier time, only to find that I had 'worries' back then too.

I'm still me, I'm still a thinker and a talker, but now I've graduated and I'm making applications to get back into higher education again.

I've just listened to Crystal Kay's "Journey" and it is such a beautiful song, my indow is open and I can hear and see the breeze as it hits the trees beyond my back garden.

I'm still living at home, taking things easy, and I've actually started a small business, if I remember I will post the link once I've finished designing the flash site.

Thanks to all the people who commented here, I aplogise for not responding to a few, you see this space was ghost for a few years, I just didn't expect anyone to stop by. A person asked me about my fake tans post, and I might be posting some results about that later - in short - it works - you should try it.

I've just arrived from a week in Nigeria and with a more chocolatey skintone, that has actually faded out a lot of my spots :)


Til next time.

Oh yes, Kate and Will's wedding was stunning and very royal :)
Current Mood: fullfull

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November 14th, 2008

08:42 am - Almost.
A few days ago I was searching for any articles, posts or blogs where teenagers put their post-almost-death experiences online. This was because my friend had been suffering from post-cancer related-surgery depression, I wanted to understand how she felt, being so young and coming so close to death. I couldn't approach the subject because I didn't know what she was going through, I would just be lying.

Well, yesterday I had a car accident, on the motorway, going at 70mph I lost control and headed straight at the LGV on my left, which caused my car to bounce off and rotate, crashes my left rear, then finally halt in the middle of the motorway, when this was over, I was sure there was going to be a pile up, but when nothing happened, I managed to stay focused, checking my blind spot and manouvring the car into the furthest left hand lane (accident lane), with no mirror to check and broken windscreen I could only guess my orientation, I managed to drive there and then whilst trying to break, my breaks didn't work, but luckily the LGV was parked infront (miracle) and I managed to hit into him which brought me to a halt. With my brain working quickly, I got out of the car instantly, by climbing out of the passenger window, which would not open, and the glass was broken (miracles everywhere!)

As soon as I got out, I couldn't breath and had to catch my breath back, and then I burst into tears...

Some wonderful passer bys helped me (Peggy thank you!), she gave me a hug and they let me sit in their car whilst I got myself together, the day didn't end until about 4 hours later...

My mum had been alerted (long story and I'm still so tired), and she probably thought I was seriously hurt or dead, and when she came to see me at the car dump/recovery yard, her face showed an expression similar to that of seeing a ghost, I went to meet her and immediately she burst into tears, I equally could not control myself, I sobbed for a good 5 minutes. We collected all my belongings from my smashed up car (which was past the point of fixing) and then my mum drove me to my university accomodation when they stayed for about half an hour or so and then left, under my request (that I was fine and didn't need to go home). Then when I had fallen asleep, I received a phone call from my Dad, telling me not to worry about the costs, and also from my sister who told me, that they wanted to come and pick me up and take me home with them, I first reassured them that I was okay, but then gave in. I'm now at home (the morning after)... my neck is a bit sore..

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July 7th, 2008

08:31 pm - I chose to go with some 14" ebony extensions in my hair

These looked gorgeous especially when I tonged my hair :)

Nothing too exciting, it just upgraded my shoulder length hair to a more volumptuous extreme...

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March 21st, 2008

03:18 am - I want a MAKE-OVER!!!
I'm quite tired of my medium length layered relaxed hair, I want a make-over... Okay, I may be eating a Cadbury's creme egg as I'm typing this but I am on a health-ier eating plan, emphasis on the -ier, as I don't agree with cutting out everything that's not beneficial to me.

Right, now I'm currently bloated and feel like I need the bathroom, but all I've had to eat is a small portion of Rice ati Obe pelu Dodo (Rice and stew with plantain) and a drink of Hot Chocolate. I think it's because I ate around 10-ish.. maybe my digestive system has gone to sleep for tonight.

I spoke to an old friend tonight.. yes a lot of people change when they go to uni, they become more mature.. and stuff!

I only just arrived home for the holidays too, I had mixed feelings, I wasn't sure whether I would miss my dorm (at S.P.C) or my bedroom at home more. But right now I'm just chillin' in the living room, nothing better than early morning chillin' yup.. 3am!

I am to get into better shape in the three weeks I have for my holiday.

I also need to get about 4 projects out of the way, I hope I don't forget to complete them..

Anyhoo, the original post refered to a make-over. I was going to put extensions in my hair and have some curly hair weaved into the back of my hair - you know, plaits at the front and curly at the back? Oui? Non? I think it'll look nice. My other choice is an open weave in brown, I had this style done when I was 16 and it got a lot of compliments, my last experience with a weave was terrible though. Never buy synthetic hair! At least buy the cheap 'human hair'.. I'm really craving this 'New Look' give the people back at uni something to talk about :P.

Peace and Love x

What my hair looks like these days
Current Location: Living Room
Current Mood: awakeawake

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January 21st, 2008


I have searched and searched and searched and not found any useful information on fake tans for dark skinned women, so of course, initially it seems ridiculous, why would you want to darked skin that is already dark etc.. but once you get past that initial surprise, you'll be able to understand. Okay, I'm not mixed raced at all but I am medium brown.. as in milk chocolate brown (not tan nor dark chocolate), because my skin isn't too dark my scars, stretchmarks and such are very visible and it annoys the heck out of me. So, I read somewhere that light skinned women tan to conceal these 'imperfections' and so I thought what if I get a fake tan cream that can either darken my skin ever so slightly so that my scars are less noticible and blend in (since my scars are darker than my skin colour) or can basically paint a coat of my skin colour over the scars so they appear less visible.. (like painting a second coat of white paint over white painted wall with a few dirt marks on it)... 

Anyways, my results are as follows,
I initially I had to get over the initial shock of becoming darker (I got the darkest of the darkest fake tan creams "Sun Lab - Ultra Dark Lotion") but then noticed that the fake tan added an orangey hue - one that could make a lighter skinned person's skin scream fake tan, or leather or orange, instead it added a lovely glow to my chocolatey skin... I became more like caramel.. I tried it on my calves and thighs and the fake tan basically didn't make my scars dissappear but my theory worked, they became less obvious as my skin was slightly darker.

More even skintone
Brings more life to cold tone skin (more like caramel)
Veyr affordable
Blends dark spots around hairs/ shaving bumps a little (emphasis on the little) bit less noticable
Dark is sexy so even if you become darker, your skin will glow as if you've just come for holiday
Blends darker parts such as armpits, knees and elbows so they are not as contrasting as they were with the rest of the skin

Not as drastic as some people may wish
Will not completely hide everything
Have to reapply almost daily if you want to remain as dark as when you initially applied the lotion
Hard to find matching shade ( I was lucky being dark already, but people who are a lighter shade of chocolate/mixed race in skintone may need to be more careful when selecting the shade to tan with
My fake tan lotion had a funny smell (not that bad though)
Washes off in shower even if you leave it on for hours after suggested period (my fake tan did anyways)

Other details:
I never put this product on my face, for that there was good ol' makeup.

Current Location: My uni dorm

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January 6th, 2008

01:48 am - I get so frustrated by the lack of...

Fashion and Beauty aids for black women who want to look GOOD these days!! I'm searching google, and seriously, you have it made if you have caucasian or even ASIAN hair, skintones figures etc... There's not that much for us darker skinned lovelies... I want to make a difference but with my student budget, I can't exactly make the sort of impact I'd like. Okay, firstly, my problem comes when I'm looking for ways to style my hair, if I choose to get a weave done, then I can exploit the endless articles on how to trim, cut, layer and colour the hair, but if I'm looking for braids, or cornrows, or even how to do weaves.. there's NOTHING! Now, I'm not sure if it's our nature to not want to make something that may be beneficial to others for free. Maybe these resources can be found, only if you purchase a braids magazine or if you visit your salon. It's sad that we don't pass on what we learn. To this date, we still don't know hoow to manage permed/relaxed hair and many of my friends complain of short hair that 'won't grow' and hair loss. WHY IS THIS!??? Okay, well since I've had to find all this stuff the hard way (trial and improvement), I'm gonna try my best to help y'all out.

I am a very beauty and fashion conscious female and I know many of you guys are too! In the next few posts, I hope to list some resources for you guys to help everyone with any queries so that we can all step up and show the world how beautiful dark can be.


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01:44 am - I've decided to completely change the direction of my journal...

From 'From Beginning to End' to 'Confessions of the Afro Diva' ... just because .... :P

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September 4th, 2007

08:57 pm - Promise

I promised myself that I wouldn't post anything relating to my boredom or lack of exciting things going on in my life. Well, that explains why my blog is pretty much empty. My driving instructor asked me yesterday (during my lesson), "So, what are you doing for the rest of your day." "Umm, lazing about, maybe I'll go back to sleep." I replied. 


"Oh.... o k." he finally says. And the conversation is pretty much dead. Am I really that strange? Is it that unusal for an 18 year old girl who is about to pack off to Uni, to find comfort in just lazing about (before the hard work begins, once again). And to be honest, my two good friends from high school are VERY different to me and they prefer doing different things - maybe even just doing things without me. 

Okay, so I started off being a very active person, walking, bike-riding, tennis, e.t.c. But then as we grew older there were more worries and things to consider. I wasn't allowed to 'go out' as much, actually no, I'm lying, I've ALWAYS had over protective parents and I guess it was just as I grew older that I got tired of trying so hard to get out. That also coincidises with the fact that I made myself an eBay account and started working on various websites and forums. There, I could be myself, I didn't have to make an excuse to these online folk why I couldn't meet up with them in the holidays or why I couldn't stay over at their houses. It all started with Neopets, which I have to admit, I was ADDICTED to and really enjoyed playing, but then that pretty much faded after it became uncool to have kacheeks instead of dogs for pets and virtual money instead of the real thing. So, naturally next came habbohotel, now this wasn't my fault, it was actually my friend at the time that introduced me to it after seeing the ad in the magazine. So I joined that, messed around, played pranks, bought - YES I actually bought 'furni' and I made lots and lots of friends. Then after that got boring, I searched for other 'virtual' worlds, finding CokeMusic and other places to roam. It was like I was free, able to do things meet people and live - all on the internet, which to be honest I didn't mind. Then after that got boring, I started searching for forums, GoLiveWire.com etc. making older friends and people who's orientation didn't circle around Cybering. Finally blogging, well naturally I'm a talker, I like - no love to talk, so of course I love the whole idea of it, and the silliest thing of it all was I found out about LiveJournal.com LAST! 

Now isn't that funny!

Update: Still living my virtual life STRONG and proud, with selling goods online as my part-time job :P.

Current Mood: goodgood

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August 28th, 2007

07:33 pm - I'm weird and I LOVE it.
Throughout highschool I could describe my role in one word. Watcher.. My definition: "A watcher is a person who merely observes his/her surroundings and rarely makes any input which would severely alter them"

So basically, I didn't do much, anything. I focused on one thing, which was to get into uni. I was very synical and I believe I was very realistic. I knew if I was to get the future that I wanted I would have to become book orientated. I became a watcher. So what if everybody was out every other weekend partying and such. I knew that I could party all I wanted AFTER I sorted out my future. Plus, I have a very effective conscience, it'd never let me live it down, if I'd failed my exams just to hang around and be cooool.

Only thing I can say about being a watcher though is that it took a lot more energy than you'd expect, not to react to decline invites etc. Not to say that I was all that popular or anything, but generally, I'm a nice girl that people wanted to be around. A lot of energy also to transform myself into the bookworm I became, since that meant that I had to focus on listening to the boring daily lectures at school and read up the extra stuff too.

I just want to make sure that you, the readers realise that I am NOT complaining, more like just stating the facts. I mean in the ned it was all worth it, and I look around me and see others who wished they had done the same.

If anybody asked me for my highschool formula I would simply put it as attending lessons + revising = pass, attending lessons - social life - parties - gigs - 'popularity' - love life = fail. It's simple, though for some it won't necessarily mean a fail, it would just mean lets say having to go to the uni you didn't want to go to or having to repeat the year again, but to me I would have felt like a failure..

I don't feel like "Gosh, I'm only 18 once, I'll never get to do this or that." after all, I'll only be 21, 25, 30 and 40 so that doesn't mean I have to go f*** up my life for the number. 

So now, after receiving the news of my pass and success, I am free to do whatever I want and I am, working on new projects, websites, going out, playing sports (again thank God! :P) and much more.

It really was all worth it.

Well done to everybody who worked hard and passed their A Levels, and also well done to all of you who worked hard and didn't pass... after all, life isn't a fairytale.

*I never proof read this, it's pretty much flow-writing*

Flow-writing: my def. = writing as your thoughts flow...

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